happy teachers day. hahas. did workout today. hahas. stupid lame workout. is really veri lame! hahas. so funny. in the whole level. only my class n 3b1 is enthu. hahas. e rest. they are not doing at all. hahas. after workout is teachers' day celebrations. it was veri nicee n funny at e beginin. but towards e end. everything becomes veri draggy n veri boring. hahas. whatsoever. hahas. den after everything. went off. they are all outside. den took cab off. hahas. joke all e way to cine. hahas. den watch movie. eeekkk. tat show is disgusting loh. but is veri nicee. hahas. den miao has to go off. so papa n her went off. left e three of us. heex. went outside cine. saw marmie.! heex. hugs tightly. miss u so much. hahas. den e three of us walk to heeren. waited for van n juliet. den wanted to take neos but they don wan to. bleahx! den play ard. den decided to go changi airport see aeroplane flyyiee. hahas. board e bus. spaces are all taken up. so we sit separately. den in e end. all of us were sitting right in front. behind e driver only. crap ard. play ard. laugh ard. hahas. it seems like 10 yrs has passed n we were still in e bus. hahas. b4 reaching changi airport. i saw a aeroplane flying off. hahas. only i saw. nv tell e rest. so bad of me. hahas. saw it flying off. feel like flying off with it. hahas. leave this place. cooll. heex. den reach liaox. juliet has to go off le. hahas. she reach liaox den have to go off liaox. poor thing. den we went to buy some food. den slack ard at changi airport. hahas. we went to take e sky train. hahas. i dunno why e whole day i have been knocking myself against alot of things de loh. wth is happenin to me? haix. den go terminal 2. walk here walk there. hahas. den van have to go off. so we all leave together. in e bus i n zaf were back facing e driver. siting in e opp direction make me feel like puking. den slack in e bus. i was damn tired. tried to slp. but was unwell. den finally got space le. change seats. after a while drop liaox. den go homee. yepps.

Friday, August 27, 2004


11:19 PM

FINALLY! cyberweek is over. the day i hv been waiting for a long time has been here! hahas. mornin handed in all our works. whoever don hand in by 8.30 will be counted as 0! hahas. wth. anyway. my grp has finished everything le. so there is nth to worry. hahas. den maths teach a new chpt. circles. tats sickkenin! i cant draw circles wit free hands! my circles turn out damn freaking weird. hahas. don even noe tat tat was a circle. hahas. i din noe wat ms kang is teaching. i practically dunno wat she is teaching from the day she come n teach us maths. wat is this?! student dunno wat the teacher is teaching at all. okie fine. i admit tat i m slow. alrites. but still i think i shud use maths to study myself bcos gg for her lesson oso no use. might as well study maths myself? somemore now got ppl to help me. but like nv help liketat cos we are always slacking ard n not studying. okie. i guess is time liaox. no matter wat i will get myself to concentrate before the sept holidays end. yup. i oso must push other ppl. althou it may seem impossible. but i will definitely do wat i can n not give up on e 2 of u. u 2 oso must cooperate wit me de leh. STUDY!!!!!! pls. better work hard. let us all work hard together and after exams we shall all play hard together as well!! hahas. i sound like a teacher now. hahas. but when i grow up never will i be a teacher. cos being a teacher is damn tough. havin students like me will kill me. hahas.

*maths tuition teacher.. hahas. no only must me concentrate leh. u oso hor. pls. don sae i veri tired. hahas. still my exams comin liaox. after my exams den u can slp all u like le lah. if i score well. confirm u will have commission de lah. i will not forget about it de. hahas. so work hard with me kaez. bear wit me. thank you.*

*miao.ben.
hey. u 2 arh. better study leh. i m veri worried for the 2 of u de leh. i m veri scared tat i cant push u 2 to study. pls study can. i don wish to see the 2 of u retain leh. study study n study. don slack anymore le can? wanna slack? we have a lot of time after exams de leh. so do it after exams lah. don do it now. we only have one more month to study only leh. den exams liaox leh. is veri fast de loh. time really flies. n now time is veri precious for u n me. so we must treasure the time n use it to study. can? can u all cooperate with me? pls.

Wednesday, August 25, 2004


11:12 AM

truthfully i hate cyberweek. i rather go to school n have normal leson. isnt it better? too much things to do within the 3 days le. n if can choose. i don wanna do the grp thingy. i only want to do the cyberweek myself. it will be much better. cos doin these grp stuffs. its so messy isnt it? is really too messy for me to understand wat e hell is goin on. i hate things which are messy loh. really 3 days is too little time for us to finish 4 reports! u want our life issit? this is crazy. n is getting crazier n crazier every single day. life is tough now.

i m not studying at all. not at all. i m slackin ard all day long. this better not continue for the next month. cos exams are comin already n i m still slackin! ppl are all muggin away n i m slackin ard all day long. this is nonsence man.! gonna stop all of these asap if not i guess i will hv to retain this yr. which i don wan to at all. i don wanna waste one more yr in e school. i hv great plans when i come out of the sch. i wanna open a pub myself. i will definitely make it. hahas. i guess i need to ask some ppl to come out n study wit me. n also i need ppl to teach me maths amaths. i need ppl to study wit me n push me to study if not i will be slackin ard instead of studyin. who can do that wit me? hmm still on a search for tat kinda person. yepps. hope i can find tat person or ppl asap. cos i m runnin out of time. now to me. time is precious. yup. gonna study real hard this time. hope i can. heex.

Monday, August 23, 2004


7:59 PM

nth much happen lately. tml is cyberweek. but i hv to go school cos i hv to hand in stuffs. sianx. i hv so much things to do durin cyberweek.?! omg. but still luckily is grp work if not i don tink i can finish it up myself. haix. my maths is failing le.! die die liaox. first time. teacher teach alot liaox i still blur blur de. haix. need someone to teach me maths. if not i dunno how to cope my amaths. cos e topic is both in maths n amaths. only diff is amaths is harder. so if i don get my trigo basic good. i m gonna suffer in my amaths. which i don wan tat at all. who will wan themselves to suffer? hahas. i doubt there is any. hahas. so sickenin! my exams are comin. n most of e teachers keep remindin me! oh pls. i noe tat exams are comin. i m scared. but e best thing is i don hv any action. haix. i think i need to push miao to study oso. cos e both of us are slackin like nobody's business. haix. i tink ben oso. but e best thing is i cant push myself to do it. hmm.. as wat my mom always sae. i m sensible enough to think but not initative enough to action it out. haix. fine. i agree wit u. i m always e one who has e most idea but nth come out of my idea cos i did nth. haahas. oh wells. i tink is time to push miao n ben to study. n all of us must sit down n study n do nth else. yup i shall try to aim for tat. heex. wish me luck..!! heex.

Sunday, August 15, 2004


6:48 PM

yesterday. went to study wit miao n all. sae is 4.30 de den in e end. i was e first to reach at 5. haix. den ben n kazaf came. when they came. they started findin where m i when i was beside them. den kazaf sae is she inside ur BINDER?? omg. pls. den they shout for my name so loud. i tink e ppl ard us noe tat i m guihe le. haix. den miao came. tok tok tok. den i took out my geog bk to study n they carry on tokin. yup. den miao sae she has to leave le. left me ben kazaf. they started finding me agn. den walk ard. den saw miao n papa at mrt there. den decided to go yishun. sat at macs. den tok tok awhile. den decided to go kbox. den we took a cab down. den sing sing sing play play play. they played tata young song. ben n kazaf started dancing. papa not there. den ben went to e speaker there continue dancing. hahas. den about 10+ took a cab home. e fare was $7.90 hahs. miao code. i was thinkin why cant it be mine? den if is mine it will be $18 hahs. i don tink tat can happen. hahas. reached home. mom ask why i got so strong smoke smell. den i sae ppl ard me got smoke de. somemore we sit outside. she give me tat kinda look as if i got smoke liketat. pls lah. i hate smokes de loh. bathe den sit down on my bed preparin to slp le. suddenly break down. cried n cried. dunno wtf is happenin to me n wth m i thinkin. haix. den i cry until i slp.

hvin a veri badd headache now. haix. my headache is backk. i need my panadols agn. haix. medi medi n medi. everyday takin medi. e sight of my medi make me puke le. everytime my mom ask me to eat. it totally change my mood. haix. i feel tat after i mix alot wit papa n grp alot of ppl has given up hope on me. haix. i tinkin is good tat u all give up hope on me. cos i m a girl witout hope anymore. there is no more light in me anymore. like a dead person. so give up hope on me. i don wanna see all of ur disappointed face. when i see e disappointed face. it hurts. i hv let u all down. is bcos of me tat made all of u disappointed. sorry. now i m girl witout hope n light. so don put hope in me le. i don deserve all e hope u all give me. i m just a girl tat nobody wants at all. a girl tat everybody detest. a girl tat ppl wanna throw it in e dustbin. a girl tat is useless. a girl tat has given up hope on herself. n most importantly. a girl tat is a true failure tat nobody wants at all.

Friday, August 13, 2004


9:16 PM

tired.. damn freakin tired nowadays.. haix.. my test.. no confidence in it at all.. not even 10%.. haix.. why m i always flungin my test? i don tink i can make it to sec 4.. omg.. i m pessimistic agn.. haix.. been thinkin alot.. i tink i shud start studyin le.. n not play everyday.. yup.. i tink tat shall be my decision.. but one thing is i cant concentrate.. not at all.. haix.. why hv i become liketat..? why? haix.. all i noe is i m much happier now.. hahas.. much much more happier than last time.. heex.. now i got alot of assignments i nv hand up.. i dunno how much red ink i will hv on my results.. haix.. i guess term 4 i cant go out anymore.. but no matter wat.. i need to +study outside wit my frens.. cos is damn lonely to study at home urself.. althou is noisy still u are not alone.. there are ppl ard me.. i will feel lonely studying dead bks.. so whoever wanna study.. come find me kaez.. we shall study together.. so yup.. heex..

Thursday, August 12, 2004


7:01 PM

hmm.. i tink i m a failure.. a true failure among everybody.. i nv hand in work.. omg.. i m gonna get a zero.. godZ!! i m dead meat.. den now.. this few days i always go home late cos i m outside.. haix.. i got nth to sae bout myself le.. hmm.. got back some papers this few days.. i failed practically all of e tests.. oh god.. i m really dead this time.. in school.. we hv 4 lessons which are free period.. so we jux sit ard n tok.. yup.. so cool.. 4 periods altogether.. hahas.. den after school went out wit hazel.. walk opp.. den miao papa n kazaf was at e chairs there.. den went off.. go heartland.. send hazel off.. went pizzahut wit kazaf.. den ordered things n etc.. den ppl came den.. yup.. den finish eatin.. miao sae she wanna take neos.. hahas.. den we went to take neos.. den saw ann na.. hahas.. she look so funny wit her specs n she took neos wit her specs.. hahas.. den went to miao hse.. do amaths.. omg.. i nearly fainted manx.. amaths is killing me le.. haix.. so went down sit swing.. miao ask why i go down alone.. i say all of u all are slpin.. hahas.. she is askin a lame qes sia.. den continue do.. den give up.. came back n do.. den slack ard.. kazaf say they leavin at 6.30.. so waited.. den in e end.. until 6.45 still at miao hse.. so went off first.. haha.. den kazaf ask me why i go first.. den i told her.. u tell me say 6.30 de leh.. now 6.45.. hahas.. den she bo way gong.. hahahs.. den took cab home.. e moment i reach home.. i told my mom.. i m gonna die bcos of amaths.. den after tokin.. she forgot to scold me liaox... hahas.. so clever rite me?? hahahs.. tml.. chem test n ting xie n compo test.. aiyo.. so many things tml.. die... i hvnt study for anything yet!! i oni study amaths.. haix.. cos i tink amaths is e oni sub i m interested in.. hahas..

Monday, August 09, 2004


6:32 PM

yesterday nite got a lot of things happen but don wanna sae.. haix.. den veri scared some tings will happen hope they will be alrite.. haix.. dunno y it bcomes liketat.. nvm.. i guess is fate ba.. haix.. today agn did nth at all.. hmm.. wanted to study.. but cant seem to concentrate on my studies.. dunno y too.. too many things botherin me le.. too much.. now i don even feel like gg to sch on wed.. shud i or shud i not go to sch on wed.. haix.. but i can avoid e prob forever.. guess i will hv to go ba.. haix.. until now i hvnt started revisin my lit test yet.. n is on wed.. omg.. i m dead this time.. my mom sae if i fail any test i m not allowed to go out anymore.. omg.. i cant stay at home e whole day de.. i will die.. i cant use e com n cant watch tv.. den wat e hell m i suppose to do at home?? study n study n more studying?? no of course not loh.. this will really make me go crazy.. n e worst thing is i cant concentrate on studyin.. i will think bout loads of things.. den in e end.. i din get to study at all.. dunno y this few days i m veri tired n sleepy.. guess i need my medi agn ba.. i need my medi to keep me awake.. so pathetic.. need e help of medi den my body can function properly.. haix.. hate this kinda life.. haix.. i dunno.. i really dunno wat to do now.. now my head is gonna brst any moment.. too many things in my head!! *argh. dying soon i guess.. isnt it better to die faster?? i tink alot of ppl is hopin me to die faster ba.. haha.. i die earlier can help them fufil a wish.. cool sia.. haha.. but i m afraid.. i dunno where will i be when i die.. after hearin stories from papa they all.. i m scared.. haha.. i m such a coward.. scared of this n scared of tat de.. haha.. lame me.. guess i shall stop here le ba.. yup..

Sunday, August 08, 2004


1:37 PM

PAPA.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!.. hahas.. celebrated papa birthday at mm.. in e mornin go school celebrate nd den rushed home to pack everything den go miao hse.. den after some packin.. took a taxi down to funan.. den walk walk den miao n me cutted hair.. hahahahahas.. den papa ben n kazaf dye hair.. hahas.. in e end.. e colour is not they want de.. haha.. den slack ard.. den we go mm liaox.. put cake n everything den we go mum mum.. hahas.. den went inside.. drink some den walk here walk there.. den daddie n kor kor came.. we spend most of our time outside.. den slack n slack.. end liaox we go back.. din slp cos got no space at all.. don wanna squeeze they all liaox so wake up n sit.. den ben woke up oso.. den pei me go out walk walk.. we ate breakfast.. bought them breakfast oso.. went bac.. decided to explore.. so we go swimmin pool.. den we went swimmin.. but den we need to take towel so went up n take towel.. haha.. den came down.. hahs.. so nicee.. long time no swim liaox.. heex.. den 10+ went up.. den wait for kazaf eat den go swimmin wit kazaf agn.. den 12+ went up.. pack everything den went off.. den intended to watch movie de but don wan le.. den eat den i go home liaox.. den i was so sleepy.. at home slept for 10 mins.. went to eat kuishinbo.. so disappointed loh.. now e standard drop liaox.. haix.. no gg there anymore le.. sleep in e car.. everyone tot i took drugs.. cos i was so sleepy.. den went home.. haha.. slp n slp.. hhaha...

*daddie.korkor.
hey.. i noe tat u all are worried for me.. but yup.. thanks so much.. n soory for make u all worry for me.. haix.. sorry.. thanks for tellin those words outside.. yup... really thank you so much.. muackks..

*u..
wat e fuck u lie to me for?? second time u lie to me.. y u wan to lie.. wanna act sye in front of me issit?? pls lah.. no use de can.. i wun be bothered wit ur this kinda syeness.. u tell me tat time i really believed even though u lie to me b4.. i was veri worried bout u.. tinkin where can u go n stay.. den in e end.. i ask them to help me call.. i don wish them to tell me tat e one who pick up is u de.. but.. i heard it.. is veri disappointin to hear tat.. cos it only show one thing.. u are at home.. b4 callin.. i send u a msg.. in e end.. i m not angry.. i m jux sad n disappointed.. now i m still wonderin.. watever u tell me.. issit true? is everything true? everything?? m i still gonna befren wit u? or wat? i really dunno.. or shud i do wat i told ben to do.. forgive n forget..?? i really dunno u noe.. i m tired le.. pls don make me even more tired can?

Thursday, August 05, 2004


9:19 PM

whahah... went to town wit papa.miao.kazaf.ben.huiting.. after ss test.. went to meet miao they all.. ss test die le lah.. haix.. but hope tat no matter wat i will pass loh.. hahas.. watever le man.. heex.. den shop for clothes.. walk ard heeren.. den found miao clothes liaox.. left me.. walk ard.. den cant find clothes.. so miao ask k to choose clothes for me.. aiyo.. den papa bought me a eeyore.. haha.. n a flower.. hahaha... THANK YOU PAPA... heex... u treat me veri well.. thank you.. heex.. after seein my clothes.. is veri late le.. den rush back home.. hahaha... cant wait for tml to come... i noe tat is gonna be a fun day.. hahaha..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO PAPA.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U!!!!!!!
i noe is a bit early but... hahas.. i wanna be e early bird... hahahahahs

Wednesday, August 04, 2004


9:17 PM

cool.. my comp is bacckiee.. hahas.. finally i can use e comp agn.. heex.. so damn happy sia.. heex.. update abit.. this few days hv been gg out wit miao n family.. hahs.. so damn funnie.. i feel tat after i mix wit them.. i m much more happier than last time le.. don u feel tat too? i m really much happier le.. joke ard wit them.. haha.. din noe they can be so funnie.. haha.. char oso felt this way.. so cool.. papa b'day comin le.. hahas.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAPA!! hahas.. on tat day u better not drunk hor.. we will not noe how to bring u back to hotel de leh.. hahas.. jux jokin.. tat nite is ur nite.. jux hv fun n we will bring u home.. haha.. they cut their hair today.. haha.. almost e same hair style lah.. den wanted to dye their hair ash colour de.. in e end nv.. hahas.. nvm.. hmm.. cant wait for friday to come.. hahas.. dunno why oso.. heex.. veri long nv update wit some ppl le.. hahas.. i tink is time to go ard updatin if not i guess is too late le.. hahas..